I was reading the local paper last week and came across a charming article on a book called ,”(It’s Great to )Suck at Something.” I won’t lie with a title like that , it had me intrigued. What I read made sense and I feel it is too good not to share.
We all suck at something that we all hope we wouldn’t. It’s life, we cannot be good at everything we do , well I know that I cannot be, but that should not stop us from trying! The author Karen Rinaldi sucks at surfing but absolutely loves it with a passion. I suck at painting but I often dream about setting up my easel outside and painting some masterful masterpiece, but I suck at it. But I enjoy doodling and drawing and one day intend to take up painting even though I suck at it.
But sucking at something according to the author is ” ..a call to unleash the unexpected bliss that occurs when we really really struggle to do something unremarkable, uncelebrated and without much to show for it.” It got me thinking that when we pursue something we are really not very good it actually frees us. It takes the pressure off us to perfect it until it is very good as we know that we are just not that great at it and this is as good as it is going to get. BUT, the feeling we get after completing it is one of jubilance! We persevere until we finish it with absolutely no expectations of perfection and we then ” become comfortable with discomfort.”
When I was in high school, I sucked at and still suck at sewing. Despite the efforts of my Grandmother to try and teach me, I had zero interest. My mother sucked at it, (although she was a fabulous knitter), I sucked at it and my sisters sucked at it. So in grade 7 in art class we did an entire unit of sewing patchwork bags and guess what….I sucked at it. But I sucked at it with perseverance, determination and with zero expectations that it would actually turn out very well. I was “invited” to sew each class next to the teacher so she could help me out…alot, but guess what? I finished that patchwork bag and it sucked, but I was so happy and proud of myself for finishing it knowing that it was not something I was particularly good at. So instead of being disappointed in myself, I was elated!
My husband and I took dance lessons before we got married and we sucked at it, but I have never laughed so much and had so much fun without any pressure to be really good at it.It is actually rather freeing.
We live in a time where everyone has to be better than the next, competition in all areas of our lives is rampant. We take tutors, we push ourselves to the max, we compare ourselves with others constantly. Now, I am not saying that we should never try our hardest and work hard to be better and improve, what I am saying is that we will not excel in all areas of our lives and that’s ok. That is actually perfectly fine. I have always told my kids that as long as you work hard at what you are doing and try your best then does not matter the outcome. I believe that we need to know that it is actually ok to suck at something. That we find something we love to do and just do it because it makes us feel good whether or not we are actually good at it. We actually do not stress as much over this and we learn to just do it with the sheer pleasure of doing it with total disregard for what others think and whether or not it is perfect.
What a wonderful lesson to teach our kids that it is actually ok to do something and really enjoy it even if you suck at it! It might encourage more people to try new things without feeling shameful or embarrassed that you cannot do them very well. Everyone has talents and everyone has things they do well, but I think we should try something we suck at once in a while and enjoy that!
